In preparation for my 8/15 show at Transistor (with the fantastic Cinchel), I’ve been exploring some alternate edits of the live set. This newer version is longer, incorporates live vocals (my own) and includes two new songs, “Entanglement” and “Like Certainty” (they start around the 45 minute mark). This set was entirely improvised and was recorded on a Zoom H2N, without any additional edits to the recording. You can DL the 60 minute off of soundcloud if you’re so inclined. 

Listen/download: by Volutes

I’ve been quietly working on new music. Here is one of those new tracks, “Like Certainty.” It’s the first release from my future LP, The Quiet Hours. It’s available for download on Bandcamp for free or for a donation (if you’re so inclined).

My first gig as an electronic musician was a success by most accounts. I thoroughly enjoyed the guy sitting in the back of the bar, yelling each time the LA Kings scored a goal. I just pretended he was celebrating my very subtle and artfully managed bass drops. 

In case you ever wondered why I do this rock n roll thing, it’s not just for the fun of performing, or my love for music and singing. It’s for the moments of connection, conversations and solidarity I experience in the women’s restroom after a show. It’s because I am on a mission - fueled by a deep desire to tell women’s stories, to be heard and to allow others to be heard in the collective hearing at a show or in a recording. It’s because I know that quiet desperation, solidarity and struggle all too well, and I am tired of women feeling like they are alone in their experience. #YesAllWomen #shespeaks

Isaidthat (via shespeaksintongues-band)

Nicholas Young invited me on to talk about my Volutes project. This conversation ranges from discussions of grief to Walter Benjamin and Tool songs. 

godeepny:

       My van was stolen yesterday in Chicago with everything Danny and I own in it, along with 4 friends’ guitars/personal items/passports. We’ve been away from home for nearly 6 months. Touring from New York to Florida, then out to LA. Stayed in LA for 3 months to write and record a full length while living in the van. And then planned to tour back through Canada finishing in NY.

         We got through Canada but lost everything yesterday in Chicago. The window was smashed out, and the van was taken in broad day light near Wicker Park. Total of somewhere near $25k worth of amps, guitars, recording equipment, and personal belongings. We don’t have any type of insurance that will cover any of these losses. I’m going to try to update photos of all of the gear…I’ll post what would be most noticeable if it popped up somewhere around Chicago or anywhere.

          Also, Some people have reached out wanting to donate. It’s truly amazing how supportive friends have been. If you want to help out at all there is a paypal at godeepny@gmail.com

       Most of the gear, including the van, I bought from sleeping on my floor for 6 months while renting my room on airbnb and working full time at a Japanese restaurant.  Danny incurred about 10k in debt buying recording equipment to finish the Mason Avery (His other project) record over the past 6 years that is now lost, as the four copies of mixes are on harddrives/computers/laptops in the van. Luckily, the Go Deep record is backed up in LA. We are feeling generally sick after pushing so hard to make music happen in our lives. If you want to help out, hit us on the paypal. Everything helps, and it will go directly to getting us back to being touring musicians.

        If you have any questions regarding anything or have any leads, email me at kris.kneale@gmail.com or get me on facebook. I’m gonna go buy a sweater now. It was cold last night. 

The Van

Green Ford E-350 2001

License Plate GKJ3343

Driver-side rear view mirror has black tape holding it up.

Rear right tire is missing it’s hubcap.

Dent at bottom of passenger rear door. And rust along the bottom edges.

Select Items that may be noticable

Seafoam Green Dillion Mosrite Guitar

Fender “Musicmaster II” Red Guitar Serial - 151330

Fender Telecaster Sunburst  Guitar - Serial - z9475201

Fender Telecaster White (Yellow Pickguard) Guitar Wear marks on front. Deftones sticker on back. 

Gibson Les Paul Signature “T” Guitar Truss rod cover changed for blank. Black/Cream binding Serial-134921439

Hohner Dark Brown Acoustic Guitar (repaired crack on the neck)

Yamaha FG-180 Acoustic Guitar Serial - 1528031

2013 Black Fender “p” Bass Guitar MIM With black Pick Guard

Universal Audio Solo 610 Preamp for Microphone

Pearl Export Drum Kit Dark Green, (Kick, two tom drums)

Zildjian K Custom 20” Ride Cymbal

Zildjian K Custom 13” Dark Hi-Hat Cymbals (pair)

Zildjian A Custom 16” Medium Crash

Zildjian “17” Fast Crash

Peavey JSX Head (Front Logo Missing)

Peavey 3120 Head

Marshall 4x12 Cab (Light Color Wood)

Acoustic 370 Bass Head

Acoustic 406 2x15 Bass Cabinet

Glyph Small Black External Hard Drive. ««<Whats on this drive means the world to us. There were 3 other copies…all on computers/hard drives in the van

LaCie Rugged Orange and Silver External Hard Drive ««<Whats on this drive means the world to us. There were 3 other copies…all on computers/hard drives in the van

Apogee Duet Sound Card Silver and Black

Strobo Stomp Tuner

http://godeepny.com

Paypal : godeepny@gmail.com

Contact: kris.kneale@gmail.com

Signal Boost. Losing any gear sucks, let alone 25K worth.

annicka:

Today at work I presented an in-progress project to our global research group that focuses on fandoms. I’ve been trying to write something meaningful on fan culture since 2011, when I worked with a large entertainment franchise to define their social fandom. I’ve worked on a number of fan-focused…

My coworker (and friend!) Anni has a big, sharp brain. 

A painful thing about encountering otherness — even in the form of music you don’t get or identify with — is that it makes you aware of your own smallness, your vulnerability and, yes, thus your shame. It undercuts any fantasy that your own lifestyle, traits and priorities might be universal — it tells you that you’re specifically bounded by your own context, while other realms may be indifferent to your existence.

"Why we Fight About Pop Music" Ann Powers + Carl Wilson

I just finished my remix of Brash Flair’s “Ready” from their wonderful album “Two.” They’re playing the Beat Kitchen tomorrow night. And if you’re around in August, I’ll be sharing a bill with them as well.

The remix can streamed and downloaded for free via Soundclound and Bandcamp

Culture may be a public good, but it’s expensive to produce. Creative workers, Taylor writes, are squeezed particularly hard in the digital era. Whereas institutions like record labels and newspapers once made investments in musicians, artists and writers, now most creative types are on their own, making their art without compensation in the hopes it’ll be a hit and they’ll be able to recoup later. The illusion of a level playing field online — that any YouTube artist could be the next Justin Bieber or any bloggers could end up the next Woodward and Bernstein — only increases the pressure on those who don’t have offline advantages. It’s impossible to be a self-made Internet star, Taylor points out, without nondigital essentials like food and shelter. “In online culture, as in off, advantage begets advantage,” she writes. No wonder so many artists are willing to “collaborate” with brands, which are becoming one of their only means of financial support. And so, despite the claims of a new era of openness, persistent social problems like discrimination and economic inequality remain firmly in place. “The new economy,” she says, “was never that novel.”

'The People's Platform' takes on the digital age of exploitation - latimes.com (via infoneer-pulse)

(via infoneer-pulse)

Here’s a recording of today’s practice. I’ve been experimenting with a Fender Bass VI, which you can hear toward the end of the set. I’m joined by my friend Jon Monteverde on keys (and other sounds). So, yeah, this is what the live set sounds like when joined by someone else. Not a perfect recording, but pretty solid to get any idea of how I spend my Sunday afternoons.

I adopted a five year doge. His name is oliver. He’s basically an old man

Some Observations About Grieving the Loss of Your Mother

My mom died unexpectedly at the beginning of this year. She had a heart attack. I’m grateful that our last call was positive and that we told each other that we loved one another. But that barely softens the blow.

I’ve been struggling with what and how to express all of the things I am feeling. I earn my living as a design researcher, as someone who identifies and models user experiences: i frame things, find meaning and make connections. I feel like all of my frames are broken, that everything is just experience without meaning.

I have been so desperate to find something-anything-that articulates some of this new emotional terrain. There’s been some luck but not much. And there are only so many books about grief one can read without wanting scream all of the time. So it seemed kind of fitting, maybe, that I ‘model’ my own experience with grief. Perhaps this will be useful to someone else, someone in the throes of grief or someone dealing with a grieving person.

8 Experience Principles of Grief, or All the Feels That I’m Having that You Might Have Too

1. Your Vulnerability Makes You Feel Exposed All of the Time: You think everyone is watching you all of time, that they see you for the scared, sad person you are (or imagine yourself to be). It’s not like feeling naked in public. For me, it’s feeling like I am without skin in public, as though I am exposed anatomy, just muscle and nerves. Nothing more.

2. There is No Longer a Buffer Between You and Death: As long as your parent is alive you will feel like you have more time. Your sense of your own demise will be theoretical - of course you know you’re going to die. But now you feel it. Everywhere. All of the time. Every time you look in the mirror, you are reminded of it. And when both of your parents and family are gone, you will feel like you are the last of your tribe. 

3. People will Disappoint You: People you expected to step up and be there for you will disappoint you. Some will barely acknowledge that your mother died, that it’s destroyed you. They’ll talk about themselves instead, never bothering to ask you about yourself. Worse, they’ll forget that your mother died. They’ll drop you a facebook note when it’s convenient for them, when they can process it. You’ll learn to stop expecting anything from anyone. This will astonish you. Truly. It will inspire rages and diatribes within you. It will confirm your suspicions that people are selfish, that most people your age are emotionally underdeveloped. 

4. Some People will Surprise You: Those who you least expect to be there for you, to be supportive, will surprise you. They’ll write you incredibly kind and warm emails welcoming you back to work or invite you over for a meal. They’ll hug you and despite the awkwardness, it’s wonderful. They’ll offer up their own stories of loss. New bridges will be made.

5. People will Avoid you because your experience will remind them of a truth they don’t want to face. You don’t blame them because this truth is awful. Nonetheless, this rejection will hurt a thousandfold because you need people more than ever right now. And nothing will make you withdraw like the truth that you-your pain-are a downer, a fucking killjoy. 

6. You will Lower Expectations of Yourself: I used to expect 200% of myself all of the time. Not healthy, I know. I held others to high standards as well. Now, I struggle to get through the day. If I am able to dress myself and look like I haven’t cried all night, I consider this a victory. The energy I spend trying to prevent my grief, anger and sadness from pouring out of me and into everything around me leaves me exhausted. I start each day at a deficit. Sadly, no one seems the wiser.

7. You Will Want Need Others to Take The Lead: Identifying my mother’s body at the morgue and deciding on what kind of funeral she would have were the most difficult  things I’ve ever done. It left me feeling like I’ve made whatever decisions I need to make for the year. Whatever impulse I had in me to lead or make ‘big’ decisions is on hiatus. I don’t want to have to text you that I need you, that I need a drink or a hug. I don’t want to reach out to people, to ask for help because frankly I don’t want to be rejected. Asking a grieving person to tell you what they need from you is a losing proposition. I can barely tell myself what I need let alone guide you. Putting the onus on a grieving person to reach out is actually a shitty and selfish thing to do. Make the decision. I’ll tell you if it’s the wrong one. 

8. You Will Lose Your Sense of Self: Your sadness will feel endless. You will feel grounded in nothing. You will want to go back to who you were before it happened. You can’t. You struggle to imagine that place, that person. You will feel so completely and totally lost. And everything will feel silly, shallow and distant. You will want to scream all of the time but you don’t. You will sneak off to cry, to mourn. You will avoid mirrors. People will tell you they miss the old you. And nothing will hurt more than that because it’s true, because you do too. 

designanthropology:

Ah, to have this kind of time and funding to do proper research projects. I love to see anthropology showing up in the news. Read about it! everyone! 

modernandmaterialthings:

My EP Elegant Grey can now be streamed on Spotify and Soundcloud

And purchased on Bandcamp, Amazon, iTunes and Google Play.